Intimidation and Believing in Yourself

Received the Crash DVD. Not bad, but I am certainly my worst critic. The producer sent along incredibly positive comments on my performance. However, I truly didn't "see" that when I watched the scene. Why do we do this to ourselves? When I arrived on set and met my co-star (actor-husband), I found out that he had done much more acting than I had...he had a "technique" for making sure we had the scene down (first panic, since I didn't). I was sure that (1) I would drop my lines, and (2) look like a piece of sh*t next to him. I had to fight to keep my thoughts positive (verses you are really f@cked, now) and not be intimidated by what I thought was a disadvantage. None of that was the case. My co-star dropped lines and according to the cast, I got "stronger" as the day wore on . It's so easy to create a scenario in our heads that is simply not reality and then perpetuate it to our detriment. Fortunately, I didn't do that, but I could have. No more "psyching myself out" and a good reminder for all of us to believe and stay focused on our talents and skills despite what is going on around us or who is hanging out amongst us!

Gigs - Gigs- Gigs...and, I'm not talking computers

Wow! My first gig with Brand and a funky job up in Los Angeles with Video Jug. I did a short job for Taco Bell this week in which I had to do a few ad-libbed lines in Spanish...yes, I think that's why my agency submitted me. Cool. No problema! It was a corporate training video on customer service. I so loooove Taco Bell...more than ever! And, I am now a practicing Tarvuist...actually a ridiculous made-up religion for a spoof testimonial on Tarvuism...a religion that teaches one how to speak to sea creatures...hmmm...airing in Europe, but maybe, here too. Also finished a few VO jobs; one for insurance and one for the mortgage biz. Should be editing the Asian Minority Bachelor soon...finally!!! And, waiting to receive my copy of Crash from the Los Angeles Film School - any day, now. My producer says I did a bang up job being anxious and angry and especially yelling the f-bomb at my whimpy, actor-husband. Way too fun. What isn't fun - my bill today for maintenance on my 2004 Honda Odyssey that I have to drive the hell-out-of to make auditions...yikes.

A scene from Crash

Recently filmed scene 27 from the movie, Crash. I play Sandra Bullock's part when she and her husband were robbed and they hired a guy to change the locks. What a fun day - getting to scream the f-bomb at my husband 15+ times! Filmed it at the Los Angeles Film School on Sunset Blvd., in Hollywood. Student films are awesome - if you get a good crew, of course. Glad I got to do it because with gas prices, it's getting harder and harder to make the L.A., auditions. You can't work unless you land a part and you typically don't land a part unless you audition, unless you're in the big leagues! Have only had 10 auditions in Orange County, but they do happen. Auditioning - what a strange thing...peeling off layers to or adding dimensions of yourself - in front of a bunch of people you don't know, hoping you'll make it through the first cut. I auditioned for the Discovery Channel's Mystery ER last week. In fact, I've auditioned twice - both times as a doctor. That would be a fun gig!

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